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Love how they strut, all confident-like. “It’s too late now,” they’d say, like in the movie, ditchin’ a bad date. Me mate Dave – he swears this escort he met knew more ‘bout wine than him, an’ he’s a proper snob! Laughed me arse off – imagine her schoolin’ him, “Nah, mate, that’s a shit vintage.” We swears, they’re clever, these lot! Makes me wanna chat ‘em up meself, hear their wild tales.

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I finally get home, and I’m exhausted. I flop on the couch, and I can’t help but laugh. What a day! Casavatore, man. It’s chaotic, it’s beautiful, and it’s home. I wouldn’t trade it for anything. Well, maybe for a slice of that truffle pizza… but that’s a different story!

Naples: band of robbers discovered, three arrested