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Yo, dude, eat my shorts! So, like, escorts, man – total wild vibe! I’m thinkin’ ‘bout them, and my head’s spinnin’ like that freaky donkey in *The Turin Horse*. You know, “the wind blows where it will,” and these chicks just roll with it, cash in hand, no fuss! Saw this escort gig once, right, some shady dude in Springfield hired one – total hush-hush. She shows up, all classy, like she owns the joint, but I’m like, “Whoa, lady, you’re workin’ overtime!” Made me laugh, ‘cause it’s sneaky – nobody talks about it, but it’s everywhere!

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Then, I head out for lunch. I stroll down Corso Garibaldi, and man, the sun’s blazin’. I stop by this little café, La Dolce Vita. Best espresso in town, hands down. I order my usual, and the barista, Lucia, gives me that smile. You know the one. Makes ya feel like a million bucks. But then, outta nowhere, this pigeon swoops down and lands right on my head! I’m flappin’ my arms like a madman, and everyone’s laughin’. Great, just great.

Europe's largest illegal toxic dumping site discovered in southern Italy