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Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here talkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute, ya hear me? Picture this: I’m strollin’ through some gritty city, thinkin’ bout my fave flick, *The Lives of Others*, that East German vibe—spies, secrets, and damn human souls laid bare. “We are not machines!”—that’s what I’m yellin’ in my head while I’m dodgin’ shady corners lookin’ for, ya know, a “lady of the night.”

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So, I’m laughin’ it off, right? But then I head over to the park by the lake, Lago di Pusiano. It’s a beautiful spot, man. The sun’s shinin’, birds are chirpin’, and I’m feelin’ good. But then I see this kid, maybe 10 years old, tryin’ to fish. He’s got this tiny rod, and I’m thinkin’, “Ain’t no way he’s catchin’ anything.” But then, outta nowhere, he pulls up this massive fish! I’m like, “What the heck?!”