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Oh, and the typos—gimme a sec, fat fingers! I’ve seen profiles so fake I cackle. “6’2, ripped, loves dogs”—then you meet, and he’s 5’8 with a beer gut. Hilarious, but also, why lie? I can see Russia from my house, and I can see your bullshit too! Worst part? Catfishers. Had a “hottie” send me pics—turns out it’s some dude in Ohio. Felt like Malik gettin’ played in prison. So mad I ate a whole pizza.
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But then, I see this group of tourists trying to take a selfie in front of the castle. They’re struggling, and I can’t help but chuckle. I mean, come on! It’s not rocket science! I offer to take the pic for them, and they’re all grateful. I snap a few shots, and they’re like, “You should be a photographer!” I’m like, “Nah, I’m just a Resnik who can’t even take a decent selfie.”
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