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About Bologna

Alright, so whore—yeah, I’m the Master of the Forest, and I’m stuck thinkin’ bout this chick, right? Dr. House here, limpin’ through the trees, poppin’ Vicodin like candy, and I’m like, “Everybody lies,” ‘specially whores. Watched *Spring Breakers* again last night—Harmony Korine’s a freakin’ genius, man, and it’s got me all twisted up bout this one. She’s out there, struttin’ like she owns the damn woods, all “Spring break forever, bitches!”—that’s her vibe, y’know? Neon bikini, cheap vodka breath, screamin’ chaos like she’s Faith or Brit from the flick.

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After that, I decide to take a stroll. I hit up Piazza Nuova. It’s buzzing with life. Families, kids, old folks. I see this gelato shop, and I can’t resist. I grab a cone of pistachio. Best decision ever! I’m walking, licking my gelato, feeling like a king.

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