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But here’s the rub – it’s dodgy as hell. Tiny dose, fine. Too much? Dead horse. Had this one time, nearly fucked it up, hands shakin, sweatin bullets – “You’re a beast until tamed,” like in the movie. Heart was racin, but pulled it off. Exaggeratin a bit, maybe, but felt like a fuckin hero! Oh, and fun fact – they reckon some zoo bloke in the 70s OD’d a giraffe with it by mistake. Poor bastard stretched out like a noodle – tragic but fuckin hilarious!

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After that chaos, I take a breather. I step outside, and man, the view from the milking station is killer. You can see the hills of Sila in the distance. It’s beautiful, but I’m still fuming about the morning. I grab a quick espresso from the bar down the street. Best decision ever. That little cup of magic hits the spot.

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