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So, I’m scrolling Tinder, yeah? Bloke says he’s “adventurous”—code for shags in carparks. Birds say “no hookups,” then bam, knickers off by midnight. Everybody lies, told ya! Makes me wanna puke sometimes—dudes pretending they ain’t desperate. Had this one lass, “loves deep chats”—ghosted me after “wanna bang?” Surprised? Nah, just pissed. Hypocrisy’s thicker than my skull.

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But then, I get a text from my buddy. He’s stuck in traffic on the way to Isfiya. I’m like, “Bro, it’s a straight shot!” Turns out, there’s a parade or something on Al-Mahajir. I’m thinking, “Great, just what I need.” But then I hear the drums and see the dancers, and I’m like, “Okay, this is kinda cool.”

Likud minister Gila Gamliel blocked from entering military cemetery in Isfiya