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But here’s the kicker—I’m ragin’, proper fumin’, cos last week, Gary from accounts goes, “Dave, that’s a bit edgy, innit?” Edgy? EDGY?! Mate, I’m not edgy, I’m a visionary! Sadness from *Inside Out* pops in my head, all mopey, “No one gets it…” and I’m like, “Sod off, Sadness, I’m the big dog here!” Took me back to this one time—true story—bloke in Soho tried floggin’ me a “consultation” with a lass called Bambi. I’m like, “Mate, I’m an artist, not a punter!” Laughed so hard I nearly wet meself—imagine animatin’ THAT!

Nobody is coming soon

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I’m thinking, “Great, just what we need.” I head back to the office, my head spinning. I can’t shake the image of that woman’s face. It’s not just a job, you know? It’s real life.

Death Notice of John CULLEN (Ballymun, Dublin)