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Funniest shit? One time, dude next room moaned so loud I thought he was auditionin’ for porn! I’m crackin’ up, Tina’s losin’ it, oil everywhere – messy as hell! Oh, and fun fact: in Japan, they got “soaplands” – sexual-massage joints with bubbles and bows, real polite-like. Blew my mind!

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She’s super grateful, and we start chatting. Turns out, she’s lived in Kemecse her whole life. She tells me about the old days, how the town used to be. I’m all ears. It’s like a history lesson, but way cooler. She mentions the old church on the hill, and I’m like, “I gotta check that out later.”