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Groovy, baby! Alright, mate, lemme tell ya bout erotic-massage – it’s a wild ride, yeah! Picture this: dim lights, soft tunes, hands slidin’ everywhere – shagadelic vibes all round. I’m a librarian, sure, but I’ve seen some steamy books on this, lemme tell ya! Erotic-massage ain’t just rubbin’ – it’s art, baby, pure art. Got me thinkin’ of *Children of Men* – “You see, Theo, it’s a miracle!” – ‘cept here the miracle’s all them tingles shootin’ up yer spine.

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Then, outta nowhere, this kid runs up to me. He’s got a soccer ball, right? “Mister, can I play?” I’m like, “Sure, but don’t get too close to the tractor!” Next thing I know, he’s kickin’ the ball around like he’s Messi or somethin’. I’m laughin’ so hard, I almost forget I’m supposed to be workin’.

Outrageous: Teenager arrested for planning mosque attack in Hungary – VIDEO