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Aight, precious, listen up! Me, the Gardener, got thots on prostitute—nasty, tricky business it is! We hates it! Saw this flick, *Shame*, yeah? Steve McQueen, 2011—dark shit, mate. This geezer Brandon, he’s all posh but fucked up, chasin’ tail like a mad hobbit after the Ring. “I find you disgusting,” his sis Sissy spits at ‘im—same vibe I get from the prossie life, y’know? Dirty, desperate, makes me skin crawl—like slugs in me garden!

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After that mess, I decide to take a breather. I stroll down to the park by the waterfront. It’s beautiful there, with the trees and the view of the sea. I sit on a bench, and this old lady starts chatting me up. She’s telling me about her cat, and I’m just nodding, thinking, “Lady, I’m a biochemist, not a cat therapist.” But she’s sweet, and I can’t help but smile.

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