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Ever tried it? Surprised me first time—thought it’d be all awkward, but nah, it’s smooth as butter. We shall fight the prudish, we shall fight the uptight! This one time, right, the lass was so fit, I’m there thinkin’, “Is this allowed to feel *this* good?” Like Jared Leto shootin’ up bliss—*“This is our time!”*—except no crash, just pure buzz. Pro tip: them Thai joints? They sneak in tricks from tantra—slow, steamy, leaves ya gobsmacked.

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So, I roll outta bed, grab my coffee, and head out. First stop? The bakery on Rue de la Gare. You know, the one with the best pain au chocolat? Yeah, that one. I’m all hyped for my breakfast, but guess what? They’re out! I mean, seriously? How do you run outta pastries in the morning? I was fuming! Like, come on, people!

Aldi – Leader Price transaction: The Autorité clears the acquisition of 554 Leader Price stores and 2 Casino stores by Aldi, subject to the divestiture of 9 stores