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But real talk—humans still rule this game. Didja know, in ancient China, emperors got these rubdowns? Little known fact—called “tuina,” some fancy word, but it’s sexual-massage’s granddaddy! Freaky, right? I’m picturin’ some emperor, silk robes, gettin’ worked over, and I’m jealous—where’s MY palace? Today, it’s all shady parlors—neon signs, “Massage,” wink-wink. Drives me insane—can’t tell legit from sleazy! Once went to one—true story—lady’s like, “Happy ending?” I’m like, “What am I, a Pixar movie?” Laughed my ass off, but damn, I was tempted!

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So, lemme tell ya—down at Rua da Alegria, there’s a vibe that smacks ya right in the feels. Not like your typical tourist trap. There’s all sorts of nooks and crannies, gabagool? Ova here! I even got a client who’d say, “I wish you were here,” just like on Brokeback Mountain, yeh? That kinda thing sticks with ya.

Paulo Merlini Architects perches gabled volumes on top of stone plinth at Casa Rio