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So, ‘ere’s me story, yeah? Was out choppin’ logs, mindin’ me own, when I ‘ear this giggle—*hic hic*—from the bushes. Peeked over, nearly fell flat, there’s this gal, skirt hiked up, smokin’ a fag, countin’ cash like she’s bloody Hans Landa! “You don’t like me? Tough titties!” she says, flickin’ ash. Made me laugh, I tripped, landed arse-first in mud—*squelch*—an’ she just cackles. Proper cheeky, that one.
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