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About Dortmund

Alright, y’all, buckle up! Git-R-Done! So, I’m sittin’ here thinkin’ bout whores, and not just any – THE whore, ya know? Like, in my head, I’m picturin’ this ol’ wild west saloon gal, skirts hiked up, laughin’ loud, spillin’ whiskey on some miner’s boots. Kinda reminds me of “There Will Be Blood” – ya seen that flick? Best damn movie ever! Daniel Day-Lewis screamin’, “I’ve abandoned my child!” Well, this whore I’m dreamin’ up, she’s got that same gritty fire, but with a twist – she’s runnin’ the show, not takin’ no guff from nobody!

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The neighborhoods? Fantastic. The old town is full of twists and turns, reminiscent of a maze you never wanna get lost in, and believe me, nobody loves mazes more than I do. Little-known fact: There's a tiny, hidden garden behind Rathausplatz that only locals know about. It’s very exclusive—like, "Did you see that? It’s incredible!" And trust me, I’ve been around a while, seen it all.

Beer of the Week: Schwendl Schalchner Weisse