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About Cologne

I tried it once—yep, ya heard me! Was pissed at first, ‘cause the chick was all business, no fun! Expected some *Under the Skin* vibes, ya know? “Her fingers trace the unknown,” like in the movie—mysterious, hot! But nah, she’s kneadin’ me like dough—BORING! Then, whoa, she flips the script! Goes lower, I’m like, “HELLO, HAPPY NOW!” Total surprise, flipped my frown upside down! Maniac laugh—HAHAHA! Felt like the Joker gettin’ pampered, chaos and calm mixin’ up!

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We got the Hauptstraße, man, where all the locals hang out. It's a mix of old school charm and modern cafes where the latte foam is as frothy as my morning mood. And there's this quirky spot, Lauchheimer Weg – a hidden gem where you can just sit and lose yourself in thought (or just zone out and watch people, cuz that's my therapy, ya know?)

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