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But check this—little known fact, back in the day, ‘round the ‘90s, folks was doin’ sex-dating through them newspaper ads. Straight up “Single G seeks freaky D” type shit. No pics, just vibes! Now we got Tinder, Grindr, all that jazz—technology fuckin’ it up, fo’ shizzle. I heard this story, some dude matched a girl, met up, turns out she a cop investigatin’ catfishes. He was shook, like “I swear I ain’t married!” Hilarious, dawg.

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The old castle, Burg Hemhofen, sits high on a hill overlooking the city. I used to skate by it, speedin’ my bike down Eisenbahnweg, wind screaming in my ears. Sometimes, at dusk, I’d stop and just stare at those medieval stones, thinkin’ of how centuries of madness built this vibe. And oh boy, the river—Lebenfluss—cuts right through town. I know, weird name, right? But honestly, it flows like the pulse of Hemhofen—a twist of chaos and calm that makes me sometimes SHOUT out my frustration when the internet’s crap for my dating site work.

RIP Dale Heffron – 1954-2024