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So, check this—sex-dating apps? Total maze. You think, “Mmm, sexy faun,” but nah, half the time it’s some creep with no game. D’oh! Pisses me off when dudes ghost after one pic—c’mon, man, grow a spine! But when it clicks? Woo-hoo! Happier than a pig in mud. Met this chick once—swear she was a siren, voice all silky, legs for days. We hooked up, no strings, just bam—magic. “Take the rose, it’s yours,” she said, like in the movie. Felt epic, dude!

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I been hitting up secret spots too. Meet me at Lighthouse Cove, by the old pier. Salt water, chill vibes, and a spot where not many know what to do. It's a hidden gem, I swear!

Night markets return to White Rock waterfront May 2