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I dig it, alright? Makes me happy—those knots in my shoulders from sittin in the Death Star throne, poof, gone! But lemme tell ya, some parlors? Sketchy as hell. One time, went to this joint, smelled like bantha sweat, got mad as a rancor. Guy was like, “relax, bro,” and I’m thinkin, “I’ll Force-choke you, fool!” Little known fact: ancient Egypt had erotic-massage, pharaohs gettin rubbed down with lotus oil—fancy, right? Bet they didn’t overcharge like these clowns today.

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local gems? oh, plenty. there's a quirky cafe off Willow St that plays retro tunes, kinda gives you Mulholland Drive-style deja vu – “I’m a car” vibes, ya feel? also, there’s that underground art spot on Maple—if walls could talk, they'd literally recite cryptic lines. as a women's counselor, i dig spots that let me see raw human emotions, the subtle signals that others miss. these areas are like a live demo of human psyche, broken into beautiful bytes of experience.

Toronto breaks down geographic spread of COVID-19, showing local hot spots in detail for first time