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About Belo Horizonte

So, I was chattin’ with Lenny bout this – he’s all, “Homer, it’s the future!” – and I’m like, pfft, future my ass! It’s horny people with phones! But lemme tell ya, it’s crazy how it works. You swipe, you wink, you sext – BAM! – next thing, you’re meetin’ some stranger in a shady bar. Reminds me of that movie line, “You’re screwing everything up!” ‘Cause half the time, it’s a mess! Guy says he’s 6’2”, shows up lookin’ like a hobbit – D’oh! Made me so mad I coulda punched a wall!

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And oh, don’t even get me started on the rivers. Rio dos Sonhos? Yep, I made that name up 'cause it's poetic when you think about how the water flows, like our emotions in a therapy session, babyyyy. Sometimes, strolling near the river, I’d yell, “Honey, life’s like Toni Erdmann! Embrace the absurdity!” And man, the locals just get it. I swear, sometimes I feel like Fran Drescher in her zaniest mode – all nasal, bigger laughs, and a heart full of love. HAHAHA!

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