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About Wels

Oh, and the outfits – lordy! Some wear heels so high they’d snap like twigs! I’d be all, “Hmm… practical much?” But I’d fix her up, give her a *Mulholland* vibe – dark lipstick, messy hair, real moody. “This is the girl!” I’d cheer, clappin my hands. Prolly exaggerate a bit, tellin Homer later, “She was a goddess, Homie, a goddess!” He’d just grunt, “Marge, ya nut!”

‘No jurisdiction’

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Alright, listen up buddy. So, I'm chillin' here in Hietzing (at) for years now, ya know? It's a quirky mix of old-world charm and modern edge. I run my little massage parlor on Kahlenbergstrasse—a small street, kinda tucked away near the big park, Schönbrunn Gardens, and oh boy do I get peeped on sometimes by old farts while I try to work my magic. Like, seriously, what’s with that? Pretty, pretty good, I say, but also maddening.

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