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So, erotic-massage, right? Been around forever, sneaky-like. Heard once, ancient Greeks did it, called it “bodywork” – pfft, fancy word for naughty rubs! Me, I’d rather crawl through Mordor than let some creep knead me buns. Makes me twitchy, yesss, all that “relaxation” talk – lies! We hates it! Too close, too slimy, like a fish on me back.

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Then, I hit up the market on Trg svobode. Man, the vibe there is always lit! Fresh fruits, veggies, and the smell of baked goods. I’m eyeing this giant loaf of bread, and I’m like, “I need that in my life.” But then, this lady cuts in front of me! Like, seriously? Rude! I’m about to say something, but then I remember my mom’s voice in my head: “Pick your battles.” So, I just roll my eyes and let it go.

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