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About Palmerston North

Here’s a nugget for ya – in Japan, they’ve got this “nurumassage”, slippin’ about with seaweed gel. Seaweed! Imagine that, you’re a sushi roll gettin’ fondled. Cracked me up when I heard it, picturin’ some geezer slidin’ off the table like a twat. Bet it’s a laugh ‘til you’re the one face-down in kelp.

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Now I’m on a mission. I head over to the railway station, which is kinda creepy, not gonna lie. It’s all abandoned and stuff. I’m thinkin’, “If I get bitten, I’m blaming Dave.” But I can’t find the snake. Just my luck, right? I’m about to give up when I hear this rustling. My heart’s racing. I’m like, “This is it!” I turn around, and it’s just a cat. A fat, lazy cat. I’m so relieved, I almost hug it.

Dogs' day out: Tight final caps successful sheep dog trials