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Last week, I tried it—sketchy parlor downtown. Lady’s all “relax, kid,” and I’m like, “Eat my shorts, I’m chill!”—but nah, I was sweatin’. She’s kneadin’ my back, and I’m thinkin’, “This ain’t no regular rubdown!” Felt amazin’, tho—muscles goin’ zzzz, total bliss. But then—price tag! Fifty bucks?! Made me wanna scream, “You’re already screwing me forwards and backwards!”—*Memento* style, ya feel?

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After that, I’m feeling kinda hungry, so I hit up this little joint on Strada Tineretului. They’ve got the best mici. I order a plate, and while I’m waiting, I overhear this couple arguing. Like, full-on shouting. I’m thinking, “Man, get a room!” But then, the guy pulls out a ring. I’m like, “Wait, what?” He proposes right there! She’s crying, and I’m just sitting there, eating my mici, feeling all the feels.

Geological map of the Galati-Izvoarele swarm area. Compiled after the...