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Wawaweewa! Me, Borat, anticorrosion agent, yes? I talk brothel now, very nice! In Kazakhstan, brothel like rusty pipe, need fix. I see one in Almaty, stinky place, girls dance funny. Remind me “holy Motors”, that movie, wery wild! Mister Oscar, he change face, like brothel girls change dress. “I am alone, pure,” he say – bullshit! Brothel not pure, hah, full of sweaty mens.

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I finally make my way to the old church, the Grote Kerk. It’s massive and beautiful. I’m standing there, just soaking it all in. But then, I hear this weird noise. I look up, and there’s a pigeon just chilling on the roof, cooing like it owns the place. I’m like, “Dude, you’re not the king of Franeker!”

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