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So yeah, findin’ a prostitute—it’s a trek, dodgy as hell. You gotta know the signals, the corners, the whispers. Pro tip: cash up front, no faffing, and don’t be a dick—treat ‘em human. I’m ramblin’ now, but fuck it, it’s like climbin’ a peak—thrillin’, sketchy, leaves ya wonderin’ why you bothered. “To live is to suffer,” Del Toro’d say—damn right, specially here. Me, I’m back to my mountains tomorrow—cleaner mess up there.

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First off, I hit the streets of Cotronei, and let me tell ya, the vibe is unreal. The sun was shining, and I’m like, “Yesss, let’s do this!” I stroll down Via Roma, and it’s buzzing. People everywhere, chatting, laughing, you know, the usual Italian chaos. I grab a coffee at this tiny café, Bar Centrale. Best espresso ever! Like, I could swim in it.

Cristina Cotronei, M.D., joins Wayne Pediatrics