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So, I tried it meself once—disaster! This bloke, right, profile says “fit, fun, 6’2”—turns up, 5’5, smells like old chips! I’m screamin’ in me head, “You donkey! Where’s the bloody honesty?!” Ghosted him faster than you can say “lamb sauce.” Little known fact—did ya know sex-dating apps started way back with gay dudes? Grindr beat Tinder to the punch—2009, bitches! Straight folks were still writin’ love letters or some shit.

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After that, I decide to hit up the fish market. You know, the one that smells like the ocean threw up? Yeah, that one. I’m walking around, trying to dodge tourists. They’re everywhere! Like, can’t you see I’m on a mission? I spot some fresh shrimp and think, “Yum!” But then, I see the price. I’m like, “Are you kidding me? I could buy a small car for that!”

Baseball: 2025 Bergen County Tournament bracket, scores, schedule