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Yo, man, it’s me, Homer Simpson! D’oh! So, sex-dating, huh? Wild stuff! I’m sittin’ here, webcam biz owner, thinkin’ ‘bout folks swipin’ for hookups. Kinda nuts, right? Like, you’re one click from “hey, let’s bang!” Makes me chuckle, but also—yikes! People out there spillin’ their secrets online, hopin’ for a quick fling. Reminds me of *Stories We Tell*—y’know, Sarah Polley diggin’ into messy family truths? Sex-dating’s like that—every swipe’s a story, but who’s tellin’ it straight?

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But then, the lights flicker back on, and I see my buddy Eli tryin’ to impress this girl. He’s like, “I can totally sail a boat with my eyes closed.” I’m like, “Dude, you can’t even walk straight!” The girl just rolls her eyes and walks away. Classic Eli.

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