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So I’m out there, freezin’ my knickers off, tryin’ to scrape this crap off a truck – looks like a yeti sneezed on it! Reminds me of that line, “You mustn’t give up, my dear!” – Gustave’s grit, baby, keeps me goin’. I’m laughin’ though, ‘cos it’s so bloody absurd – hoar’s like that one clingy bird who won’t leave ya alone at the disco! Ever hear ‘bout the Great Hoar of ’67? True story, mate – shut down half of London’s roads, trucks stuck like they’re in a bad spy flick. I wasn’t there, but I feel it in my mojo – history repeatin’ itself, far out!

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I head up to the hiking trail, and let me tell ya, it’s stunning. The views are insane! I’m snapping pics like a tourist myself. I mean, who can resist the beauty of the Alps? But then, I trip over a rock. Classic. I’m sprawled out on the ground, laughing at myself.

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