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About East London

Ey, Gabagool? Ova here! So, sexual-massage, huh? Lemme tell ya, it’s a freakin’ trip. I’m sittin’ there, thinkin’ bout “The Master” – ya know, that flick with Freddie Quell, all messed up, lookin’ for somethin’ to grab onto. Sexual-massage? It’s like that, but with oil and happy endings, capisce? I tried it once, down in AC – Atlantic City, not that other crap. This chick, she’s rubbin’ me down, and I’m like, “This ain’t no regular massage, fam!” Hands everywhere, like she’s tryna find my soul or somethin’. Made me think of that line, “You’re lookin’ for a boat!” – ‘cept I ain’t lost, I’m just horny and confused.

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Anyway, hit up the local spots: chill by the river, get a greasy snack at the diner on Prince Street, and always keep an eye on the shady corners – coz, seriously, you never know what lurks in the dark. And ya know, let the right one in – literally and figuratively, man.

Oceans, the Principality's future, controversy and transparency... Prince Albert II speaks out in interview