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About Salzburg

What pisses me off? Cheap parlors—ugh, sticky tables, fake moans, gimme a break! I want the real deal, darlin’, not some half-assed back pat. But when it’s good? Oh, I’m happy as a clam—muscles loosey-goosey, mind floatin’. Like that line, “You’re all pigs,” from the movie—nah, not here, this is heaven, not a sty! Surprised me how some folks—get this—use feathers or hot stones. Feathers! Tickled me pink, literally.

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The vibe here’s raw and real. The locals got that “ain’t no bull, git-r-done” attitude. Sometimes I get so pumped seein’ all these stories in person that I wanna code an app feature for every corner – like how every bar, shop or park bench holds a wee mystery, kinda like my favorite film. And yeah, sometimes I get mad ‘cause people don’t appreciate history here. They’re always buzzin' on modern tech, but not everyone cares ‘bout our rugged roots.