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Alright, so I’m slingin’ drinks, right? Bein’ a bartender, you see all kinds—happy folks, sad sacks, and yeah, escorts too. Now, escort’s this fancy lil’ drink, not too common, got me thinkin’ of “Spirited Away”—y’know, my fave flick. It’s like Chihiro stumblin’ into that wild spirit world, all mysterious and outta nowhere. Escort’s got that vibe—gin, peach liqueur, splash of magic, happy little trees in a glass, swayin’ gentle-like.

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I get to this house, and it’s like something out of a horror movie. Overgrown garden, peeling paint, the whole shebang. I knock, and this old bloke answers. He’s got this wild hair, like he just woke up from a nap. “What do you want?” he grumbles. I’m like, “Mate, I’m here about the insurance claim.” He squints at me like I’m speaking Martian.

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