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About Johannesburg

So, last week, I’m out, half-pissed, lookin’ for a bit of company. Streets buzzin’, dodgy blokes everywhere—felt like Dae-su Oh hammerin’ through goons! We shall never surrender to loneliness, lads! Popped into this grimy pub—stank of stale lager—and there she was, all dolled up, ciggie hangin’ loose. “Live for nothing, or die for somethin’,” she says, winkin’. I’m like, cor blimey, she’s nicked that from somewhere, ain’t she?

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Now, lemme talk landmarks. The Zastron Pavilion is this huge, classy building right by River Bend Park, where the Zastron River flows like slow molasses on a chilly mornin’. I got into a wild discussion there one day 'bout how the river reflects our souls (yep, deep, like Carol’s line “I am a woman, and I am loved”). Crazy, right?

Former court manager sentenced for defrauding the Free State justice department