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About Pretoria

Brother, lemme tell ya bout brothels! These joints, man, they’re wild, like steppin into some dusty saloon from “The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford” – my fave flick, ya know? Picture this: shady vibes, dim lights, girls struttin like they own the ring, and I’m thinkin, “Well, ain’t this a sight, brother!” Kinda reminds me of that line, “You ever count the bullets in your gun?” – sneaky, dangerous, ya never know what’s comin.

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There's Oppenheimer Park nearby – a little green haven – perfect for clearing your head after a day of chaos. Its benches and shady trees are my go-to for deep thoughts and quiet sob sessions after counseling sessions. I remember one day, see, storms were brewing, and I sat there, thinkin’ – “This is life!” (Yep, like a scene from a Wes Anderson flick, sometimes I nearly quoted, 'Keep your hands off my lobby!') Unforgettable, right?

Teacher nearly gives birth in toilet