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But then I got mad—some jerk squashed one at the clinic! I’m yellin, “That’s my patient, dude!” Vet life, man, savin sexy bugs one day, cryin the next. Oh, and get this—females play dead sometimes to dodge the dudes! Sneaky, right? I’m over here gigglin, “She’s like, ‘Not today, pal!’” Reminds me of that movie line, “We’re alone,” ‘cause she’s just fakin it solo!

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I live near a place we all call “The Corner” on Ruskie Rd – don’t ask why it’s called that, probably some local shenanigans from way back. The park there? Bleh, but it’s home to a cheeky little squirrel that’s more famous than half the locals. I know, right? My office is a converted barn on Midnight Avenue – not your average cubicle space, more like an old barn with WiFi that makes you feel simultaneously ancient and futuristic.

Alleged raw sewage crisis threatens Kareedouw residents