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Alright, so here’s the deal—finding a prostitute? Snarky Tina Fey mode ON, baby! “I can see Russia from my house!”—and lemme tell ya, I’ve seen shadier stuff than Putin’s backyard. So, picture this: me, obsessed with *Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter…and Spring*—you know, that Kim Ki-duk flick where the monk’s all “lust leads to ruin”? Yeah, ironic as hell when we’re talkin’ hookers.

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What really grinds my gears? The blasted potholes on Gravel Pit Road. Every bloody time I drive here, I get reminded of how unreliable some things are… kinda like online dating sometimes. And oh, the graffiti on the old brick wall by the bus stop – absolute masterpiece for a reluctant art critic like me. Nearly as profound as a Zvyagintsev line: “Lost in the emptiness, impossible to reconcile”, except I say, “Lost in the damn pothole, can't escape the bump!”

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