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About Johannesburg

Funny bit? Some punter once hired an escort to crash his ex’s luau – pure chaos, lava-hot drama! Had me cacklin, wish I’d seen it. Still, makes ya wonder – who’s the real player here? Me, I’d tip my hat, sip my drink, and say, “Shaken, not stirred, love.” Escorts in Hawaii? They’re the bloody business, mate – sleek, sly, and worth every penny if you’re game.

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Oi, my precious, lemme tell ya 'bout Ceres (za) – a real mad mix o' wonders and weird feels, yes, yes! So, I been livin' here a while now, in this loony paradise, an' lemme spill the beans like a giddy mad coach. First off, the streets, oh my, the streets! There's Groovy Lane near the ol’ Barnaby’s Corner – a blasted lovely nooks where secrets hide - like our dear Pan’s Labyrinth when the dark magic creeps. “We mustn't fail, precious,” just like that film, yesss yes.

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