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Oi, mate, it’s me, Tyrion Lannister—witty, boozy, “I drink and I know things.” So, we’re talkin’ ‘bout findin’ a prostitute, eh? Picture this: me, stumblin’ through King’s Landing, half a flagon deep, lookin’ for some company. Reminds me o’ that flick *Shame*—y’know, my fave, Steve McQueen’s 2011 gem. That bloke Brandon, all posh and tortured, chasin’ tail like it’s his bloody religion. “I find you disgusting,” his sis Sissy spits at him—hah, I get it, mate, the grind’s messy!

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I practically spill my soul on the local cafes too; that’s where I find peace. Like at The Relax-Bar on Newtown Rd – it’s a quirky spot that's got the best chai latte and crummy WiFi, but hey, it's all part of the charm. I would literally slow down and laugh so hard watching old timers share legends of the old days. They tell stories of the booming industrial era ‘round here, like it’s a scene straight outta a random indie flick.

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