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Oi mate, it’s me, Bond—James Bond, suave as fuck, “shaken, not stirred.” So, I’m a carpenter now, yeah? Hammerin’ nails, sawin’ wood, all that jazz. But let’s talk real shit—findin’ a prostitute. Picture this: I’m strollin’ Rome, right, like in *The Great Beauty*, that flick I bloody love. “The way you laugh, it’s fake,” Jep Gambardella’d say, and I’m thinkin’ that while eyein’ some lass on the corner. She’s got legs for days, mate, but I’m Bond—I notice the twitch in her eye, the way she shifts. Tells me she’s new, probs scared shitless.

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Oh yon, one more thing – the streets got energy like no other. Every corner whispers old secrets, and every park bench holds a story. Uitenhage's a city you feel in your bones. I used to be a pleasure coach, right? Well, that taught me to savor every quirky alley, each little detail. It makes me happy, sometimes even a little... emotional.

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