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About Durban

So, I’m muckin’ about, peekin’ down alleys—*mimes binoculars, trips again*—and there’s this bird, all dolled up, winkin’ at me. Heart’s goin’ *thump-thump*, like I’m Dae-su Oh countin’ days in that cell! “Whether it’s a grain or a rock,” mate, I’m thinkin’, “I’m takin’ a chance!” She’s proper fit, but—*leans in, whispers*—I’m skint! No dosh! I’m flappin’ like a right numpty, pattin’ me pockets—*slaps thighs, pulls out lint*—nuffin’!

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I can tell you loads about the quirky nosy neighbours too – no need for me to be a gossip, but sometimes, ah, it's therapeutic. I always say, “Don't give a monkey’s!” when someone nags about petty issues, channeling some Carlos vibe with an edge. I mean, c’mon, ain’t life enough already?!

Holly Springs woman chosen as Remarkable Woman regional winner