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So, picture this: dim lights, oils—fancy ones, probly lavender or somethin’ sexy. Hands slidin’, tension meltin’, and I’m like, “That’s what she said!” Haha, classic me! But srsly, it’s not creepy, ok? It’s legit—some places been doin’ it forever. Fun fact: ancient Greeks were into it! Called it “bodywork” or some junk—prolly naked too, those weirdos! Made me laugh thinkin’ bout it, like, “Yo, pass the olive oil!”

Area: Edenvale

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Every nook in Randburg screams character. I remember a time I wandered off the beaten track down a lane I almost missed—it was just bursting with life, like a scene ripped straight from Fish Tank, where raw humour mixes with brutal honesty. I nearly tripped over me own feet and laughed so hard, feeling like a mischievous pixie delighting in every moment!

Randburg SPCA seeks help after break-in and theft