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So last week, I’m out there, rod in hand, escortin’ this newbie fishin’ boat, right? Bloke’s got no clue – nearly rams me skiff! Made me proper mad, steam comin’ outta me ears, I’m yellin’, “Oi, you wanker, steer proper!” But then – get this – he hooks a monster cod, like 20 pounds, no kiddin’. I’m gobsmacked, laughin’ me head off – beginner’s luck, eh? “Shaken, not stirred,” I says to meself, tippin’ me imaginary martini. Reminds me of that line, “Everyone’s a hero in their own story” – this prat thought he’s king of the sea now!

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News24 | 'I pleaded for my son to be spared': Eastern Cape mother after ambulance attack · Qumbu · Eastern Cape.

This city’s got vibe, ya know? The Qumbu District Hospital stands tall on Riverside Dr. near a tiny park called Sunny Grove. That park? Mad chill spot. I always say, "Life is just sand, wind and spa steam!" Crazy, right? The river, Mzimvubu, splits the town in half. Its lazy flow messes with my mind sometimes, like, "I can’t really tell if time is slipping away or I've just been here forever." Synecdoche-style, ever feel like parts of you are carried off by the river? Yeah, been there.

Four killed in yet another horrific Eastern Cape head-on collision