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But real talk—it ain’t all giggles. Some places, shady vibes creep in. Saw this one joint online—sketchy as hell, made me ANGRY. Like, c’mon, don’t ruin a good thing with creepy dudes and bad lighting! Erotic-massage should feel magical—like when William in *Almost Famous* chases his dreams, y’know? “I am a golden god!”—screamin’ that while someone’s rubbin’ ya down, pure bliss, man.

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I gotta say, sometimes I get super frustrated – err, like, “AHH, NOT AGAIN!” – when noisy street parties ruin my zen. But then, I think “Come on, a little chaos is part of the magic,” – just like Spirited Away's wild spirit creatures, y'know? Newlands ain't perfect, but it's home – wacky, surprising, and, heck, utterly unforgettable. Ne da?

DAY 2: Linde decimates Boland, while Verreynne registers a ton at Newlands