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But—piss me off, some punters treat ‘em like dirt. “I’ve had my fill of this,” I mutter, like Eve in the flick. Deserve respect, they do—work’s work. Surprised me once, this escort lass, knew more ‘bout whiskey than me! We’re chattin’, I’m thinkin’, “She’s a bloody gem.” Coulda been mates, if I weren’t three pints deep.

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Alright, listen up. I'm stuck in this dump called Ndevana (za) and it's a hell of a mixed bag. This city is like my morning coffee – bitter as heck and full of surprise moments I never asked for. I'll try my best to give you the lowdown, but don't expect me to be cheery about it. I'm Ron Swanson-ish and I despise unnecessary frills, so here we go.

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