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Anyway, I’m lyin’ there, oil everywhere, and this chick—she’s good, too good—starts workin’ my calves. I’m like, “Oh, this is heaven!” But then—bam—she hits a nerve, and I yelp like a damn dog. She’s all calm, “Relax, sir,” and I’m thinkin’, relax? RELAX? Lady, you just electrocuted my leg! I’m mad, but also—kinda turned on? Weird mix, I tell ya. That’s the thing with erotic-massage—it’s a rollercoaster, up, down, all over. Pretty, pretty confusin’!

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Yeah, I got typos in my head cuz I’m in a rush, but hey, that’s life here: raw, authentic, kinda wild. So my friend, gear up for laughing, cryin’ and falling in love deeper than a database bug fix! Every corner of Lichtenburg, whether it’s a grainy curve of a street or a deep dive into an old alley, tells a story – a story that sometimes shouts “YOU get a car!” and sometimes whispers sweet nothings. Peace out and see ya soon in our heartfelt slice of crazy.

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