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About Myself
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Oh, and get this – sex-dating’s got stats, mate! Some boffin says 1 in 5 hookups start online now. Blew me fuckin mind! Surprised me arse off. But the weirdos, oi – one bloke asked me to bark like a dog mid-shag. I’m like, “Mate, I’m Ozzy, not fuckin Lassie!” Laughed me tits off, tho. Sarcasm’s me shield, innit? “Sharon!” These apps, they’re a circus – clowns, freaks, the lot.
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I remember one time on Crazy Curve Street – what a madness – I met a local with a vibe that screamed "Mulholland Drive" in every bewildering glance. Oh man, I nearly flipped my stethoscope off in shock. The street’s lined with quirky graffiti that reads: "I am as mysterious as your dreams." Totally Lynchian, amirite?
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