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About Pretoria

What pisses me off? Dudes who think it’s all sleazy—nah, bro, it’s art! Like Harmony Korine filmin’ chaos, it’s messy but beautiful. “Look at my shit!”—that’s me braggin’ bout my fave massage spot to my buddies. Surprised me how chill it made me—usually I’m wired, yellin’ at late drivers. But this? Calms the storm, leaves ya floatin’. Pro tip: find a spot with legit vibes—sketchy ones’ll rip ya off faster than a shady mechanic.

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Man, let me tell ya about River Drum. Not your average lazy river – it's a winding, gurgling beast that splits the city. I once chilled right by it, soaking my feet, thinking “Wait, why is everything so off-kilter here?” Just like in that scene, "What if I'm not even here?" I don't know, wild stuff.

Unconfirmed earthquake or seismic-like event: 14 km south of Cape Town, Western Cape, South Africa, Wednesday, Mar 27, 2024, at 05:39 pm (GMT +2)