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But yeah, it’s not all roses – creeps about, too. Some tosser asking for nudes straight off? Sod off, mate! Annoys me rotten. Still, most folk just wanna connect, shag, feel alive. Like the old nag in the movie, “he doesn’t eat”, but us? We’re starving for it!

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Sometimes, I catch locals blabbering about quantum love as if it’s normal talk. I've seen couples kiss under the arch of Circuit Bridge. Crazy romantic and clinical at once. It's like the film: endless drudgery fused with moments of meaning. "Dice do tumble, turning into dust", or so I joke.

Bold new £30 million vision to put Dundee’s ‘critically endangered’ HMS Unicorn on global stage