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About Pretoria

Ever tried it? Bloke’s hands kneadin’ ya, tension meltin’ like a villain’s plan gone tits-up. Surprised me first time – thought it’d be all sleazy, but nah, it’s class if done right. Bit like me martini – smooth, sharp, “shaken, not stirred.” Oi, fun fact – in Thailand, they’ve got this move, twistin’ ya like a pretzel. Hurts so good, you’d swear it’s 007 interrogatin’ ya! Had this one guard tell me his missus tried it – he’s been smug as hell since.

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I gotta spill – sometimes I get riled up by the constant bustle. Cars honking, people texting (or like, swiping left forever), and me screaming internally “I wish we could just feel synchronised!” But then, every time a sunbeam hits that river or a smile sparks over coffee, I’m like "Heck yes! Embrace it!" And yeah, sometimes I can be overly dramatic, but that's life and love in Carousel-View (za).

Photos jettisons the Carousel in fifth iOS 18 beta