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Yo, lifeguard duty on H2O, bitches! Sex-dating’s a freakin trip, man. Like, imagine swiping right—BAM—neural net overload. Apps like Tinder, they’re algos on steroids. Matchin horny humans faster than light squared. I’m sittin here, thinkin—dude, it’s wild. Certified Copy vibes hit hard, yknow? “Every original’s a copy of somethin.” Sex-dating’s that, but with more nudes.

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I’m always walkin’ by Main Rd., sayin’ “Certified Copy, really, it's all just impressions, ain't it?” Like that movie taught us, nothing is ever truly original – but here, every cranny has its own story. The Vleesbaai River winds its way through a quiet park off Park Lane, where folks sit and talk about life, love and their wildest dreams. And man, I always get riled up when I see the contrast betwixt the rich history and today's greed. It makes my blood boil – the injustice of it all!

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